The Joke Thread

CroJack

Key Player

Jackflash

Midfield General
Staff member
In about 2 months time Boris qualifies for his full time membership. A position no other PM has found achievable in their stay at No 10.
 

ivoralljack

Grizzled Veteran
Staff member
Amusing piece in the Sun today:

The latest marvellous trend is called vabbing. That is when young ladies use their own bodily fluids as a perfume. As a means of attracting men - quick rummage down below then a dab behind each ear. And then let the pheromones get to work.

I saw a lass down our high street who I think had done exactly that. She didn't have any men in attendance but she was being followed home by about 50 cats!!
 

ivoralljack

Grizzled Veteran
Staff member
It is said that when Christopher Columbus started out from Spain, he did not know where he was going; when he got there, he didn't know where he was; and when he got back, he didn't know where he had been! And the whole trip was done on someone else's money.
 

ivoralljack

Grizzled Veteran
Staff member
Walking down a dark alley with my mate the other night and we saw six guys giving this woman a real pummelling. To my horror I saw that it was his mother-in-law. "Are you going to help?" I shouted at him.

"Nah," he replied, "six should be enough!"
 

Jackflash

Midfield General
Staff member
Its now been revealed that Chris Eubanks was Boris Johnsons personal Ethics advisor. he has since relinquished the post due to the fact that he used to live in Ethics, but has now moved to Thussex.
 
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ivoralljack

Grizzled Veteran
Staff member
George Kaufman (American playwright) on actor Raymond Massey's determination to stay in his Abraham Lincoln character even when off-stage:

"Massey won't be satisfied until somebody assassinates him."
 
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